Haaaappy Newww Yeaaaars everyone!!!
January 1, 2010 at 10:15 pm | In Personal | Leave a Comment
Yes yes yes I am once again despicably, unforgivably late with a new post, and I am quite aware that I have depleted all Sorry-I’ve-Been-Bad-At-Blogging cards… unless they replenish at the start of every year? …Yeah ok they don’t. Anyhow, here is my review of experiences last year — I personally don’t recommend reading it, unless you awoke plastered from New Years Eve and could benefit from an emetic:
Last year… was definitely something, I tell ya. It was my 1st full year out of school and living in the city, but much more crucially, it was the year I completed the Bicycle Album, and finally started what feels like the rest of my life. For though the Bicycle Songcycle project started only 2 years ago, I’ve been imbued this inexplicably anxious, clawing need to create (and finish) something of that magnitude since.. oh boy, since I could create! But it didn’t really start to drive me mad till I was 18 and started college.
From that age till the completion of the album, I feel like I was privileged with this almost superhuman (sometimes more Mephistophelean), ravenous diligence, courage, and continence (read:nosex) to complete this. It still kinda baffles me. But when I finished the Bike album and created my Summer To-Do List, piling on new projects as if I could conquer any other creative feat from then on, I realized I just felt very… different. I realized that upon finishing the album, I had forfeited all those powers, exactly because they were never sustainable. They were borrowed from, and depleting, the time and reserves meant for responsibilities and maturity which were stunted and resisted in exchange.
So instead of my Summer To-Do List, I involuntarily gravitated towards long-delayed responsibilities, lending my time to (and appreciating) cleaning and chores, catching up with friends, experiencing other music, literature, and art. I saw this attention to my affairs no longer as a waste of time that would spoil all my hard work (“I’m just about to come up with the perfect chord progression! I can NOT be bothered!”) and viewed this necessity as beautiful and essential to clarity. Life is so nice when you can keep a steady hand on all your affairs, and when you realize you aren’t hiding from anything.
Armed with that sensibility now, I am GREATLY looking forward to this new year. And what is the new goal at hand (other than finishing all that shit I didn’t over Summer)? It is to experience — to create and intake — as much as I goddamn can, for I’ve got about 2 – 3 years before I plan to go to grad school (for music composition, I’m thinkin’) and I want to imbibe creatively as much as I can in my freedom before it’s back to reading and doing what people tell you to do for 4 years.
And I do believe that’s sufficient reason to regain some that previous hunger and drive back. I’m not too worried about that.
Look forward to the next post illustrating this majestic list of things to do! I hope it is a great, great New Years for all of you, and want to apologize if I drunk dialed you at midnight, cause I don’t remember what I said, but it was probably inappropriate. HAPPY NEW YEARS!
Rosh Hashanah celebration
September 21, 2009 at 7:46 am | In Food is for friends | 3 Comments
I was having some leftover honey cake and milk when I realized I haven’t told you about all the cooking and baking I’ve been doing recently! Cooking with friends is one of the things that makes my heart happiest. And this last Friday, what was supposed to be just a planning session with Dan and DCE for a Sewing Pattern music video (more on that later!!) blossomed into an apartment-wide celebration of Rosh Hashanah and an amazing potluck dinner!
After eating apple slices dipped in honey to ring in the sweet new year, we had brisket, kugel, mashed potatoes, carmelized veggies, salad, challah, and honey cake – all with conversation not all at okay for any religious celebration. …Much like the night I took Andrew Young and Brian out to celebrate the completion of the Bicycle Songycle at a fancy restaurant, and we discussed matters such as the movie Teeth – the one where that girl’s cooter bites off –whyyy is talking about that one of my past times..?
Anyhow, everyone’s dishes came out so well, including my honey cake, which I’m so thankful for. You must all try this perfect recipe from Smitten Kitchen – it’s the first time I’ve ever tasted honey cake, but it tastes as adorable as the name sounds (and it makes TWO cakes! One for your friends, and a secret one for yourself)!
Finally, I ended the evening as I end all evenings, by watching an episode of 30 Rock, when I noticed I was wearing the same shirt as Tina Fey in a scene where she’s crying drunk in the bathroom. …And I think that’s the best omen for a new year I could hope for. L’shana Tovah, Tina Fey.
Thanks Whistler! And here’s some rad music
September 2, 2009 at 2:24 pm | In Things I love | 2 Comments
The Whistler gig was soooo fun!! Thank you so much to everyone who came out, and I hope you had a good time too! As the first gig since the Bicycle Songcycle CD release show, I’m pleasantly surprised at the lack of shitting myself on stage or crying that I’d envisioned. Turns out I did just enough in the days prior.. I *do* however now have an addiction to playing on stage with monitors. I don’t know if y’all have ever experienced it, or if y’all have ever done some cocaine — I haven’t (done coke), but I’m pretty sure both give you a REAL big false sense of importance and that you’re saying REALLY good stuff.
Anywaays, what I truly want to share with you in this post though, are two KICK-ASS songs I was recently introduced to by two dearly loved friends. Song #1 is Paul Simon’s “My Little Town,” which Andrew Scott Young (one of my favorite people ever) shared with us at the Chateau one magical day. Song #2 is “Shooting Stars” by Bag Raiders feat. Rhys that Daniel of Flashmen (who, along with all other hip electro-disco bloggers, swear by anything with Bag Raiders’ imprimatur) put on at a party we both got to DJ for.
They’re pretty far opposite from each other in the spectrum of pop songs, aside from one crucial aspect of their form: They both push their choruses to the end of the song.
A teacher once told me after I shared a song I wrote with him that it’s kind of weird and not a good idea to put the chorus at the end. But yep, fuck whatever he says cause the best rule about making things is that you can do whatever you goddamn want. It’s not that it’s a bad idea or a weird thing, it’s that — if you are in fact choosing to make something that is engaging to others — it takes craft to maintain balance and interest, and to create a solid song.
Both these songs grip the listeners just enough throughout their repeated verses to keep them listening (with Paul Simon’s seemingly pastoral lyrics or Bag Raiders’ building, pulsating riff), yet leave it not quite gripping enough to make the listener yearn for something more, something big, BIG enough to fuck shit up. And daaaamn when it’s time, they each unveil a solid fucking chorus, and repeat it over and over, like an anthem, to compensate and make you wholly believe it was worth the wait.
Ah I’m ruining the songs by talking about them. Enough. Listen and enjoy!!
| Paul Simon – My Little Town | |
| Bag Raiders – Shooting Stars (feat. Rhys) |
Upcoming show at the Whistler!
August 22, 2009 at 8:04 pm | In The Summer List | Leave a CommentHi everyone! Just a quick update of what I’ve been up to lately:
I have been very luckily and gratefully handed a few gigs here and there, most recently performing a podcast set for Chicago Acoustic Underground (where I was interviewed the sweetest, friendliest Christine and Michael!). I believe it will be available for listening in about a month and a half, and then we can all get together and have a good laugh at me.
Up next, I have a show at the Whistler in Logan Square (2421 N Milwaukee Ave)! I’m playing after the beautiful Eliza Rickman from California. Sewing Pattern will be a sextet that evening, and I’m so very excited to play with my friends who are such great musicians. Eliza goes on at 10p, then Sewing Pattern at 11p. The show is 21+, no cover!
Please come on out if you can, it’s gonna be fun! And check out this amazingly pretty poster that Aaron Albarran made for the show. Isn’t it the prettiest??! This might one of the best perks of making music that I will ever know of– friends making you a show poster.
Alright, I’m off to party at DCE’s & Quinn’s apartment, with people I love and respect very dearly! The last party I believe they hosted that I attended was my 21st birthday party, where I passed out after the first fifteen minutes, face down into someone’s crotch. I think it’s safe to assume I forfeited mutual respect.
What I did (instead) this summer
August 4, 2009 at 8:31 am | In The Summer List | 3 Comments
Oh boy, what a summer it’s been!! I’m very sorry for such a huge gap in updating. It’s as if the last two months have just gone by in a flash! If I had been told that instead of diligently writing songs and sewing in my studio every summer night, I’d actually be playing jazz bass, DJing, and modeling as a geisha, I’d say, “Hm. I think you have me confused with someone else.. and she sounds like a WHORE.”
…and have I been doing all those things instead?: Yes, and it’s been AWESOME —.
I’ve always been used to acting as a stalwart servant to academic courses and projects, and I guess now that I’ve graduated and the Bike project is over… entropy happened. But in a great way…! (cognitive dissonance? spin doctoring? You be the judge.) And I swear I’ve still been hitting some of the summer projects from my previous entry (and oh they WILL all get done, I promise you!) but I’ve taken on several new ones too! Here’s what I’ve been doing instead of my summer to-do list:
- I’ve been playing gigs, but… not of my own songs, or even on my usual instruments. I picked up the electric bass for my friends, L and Joe, who landed a wedding gig up up in classy Lake Forest. They needed a bass player, so I figured I was up for it! The gig was about a week ago, and it went wonderfully. Talented kids, Joe and L, I tell ya…
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- I’m also been scoring some DJ gigs that were most definitely hand-me-downs from Daniel of Flashmen, that have been so fun! (And where the main goal is consistently to score some of that pink liquer that the bartender is not allowed to serve me or any of “the help”). Daniel has coined a name for us when we start DJ-ing gigs together. We will be called: AWESOME FRIENDSHIP (isn’t that the best name?!) I don’t know when it’s coming, but you watch out.
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- I also had the supreme honor of singing back-up for Flashmen’s latest single, “As the Night Rolls On” which features Daniel on lead, and Brian (my beautiful roommate of the former Chateau) on ridiculously badass 80’s guitar (which he pulled extemporaneously out of his incredibly talented ass). Check it out here!
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- Oh and the geisha shoot? Right… Essentially, I was dancing at the Burlington’s Oldies Night and got asked by a photographer if I would wear geisha clothes for some photos. I just made sure it was solely to don the clothes and not… geisha….. responsibilities. Then I figured, “Sure, why not. It’s your loss, really.” And oh it WAS.
As for the things that were on my summer to-do list, I have been working on my songs whenever I have a free second, made the decision of the line-up for my 2nd album, and have all the songs in incipient stages, if not in completion and ready to be arranged! Alas, I’ve come to grow fond of the Bicycle Songcycle, and now dread to think that an album about such trite issues as love and friendship and creativity is worth making. I try to remind myself that that I do just hate whatever I’m currently working on.
I’ve also been hemming some skirts and decorating my bedroom, which I will definitely show you very soon, as I recently finally purchased a new digital camera!
So has it been a great summer? HELLLLL yes. Intensely erratic and too much fun, but with creativity always immanent. But as far as I’m concerned, August is for making songs and sharing them with you guys.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a very important package I’ve been meaning to open from the BFFEs (coolest girls in the world)…
The honeymoon’s over, SUMMER’S HERE!
May 19, 2009 at 6:54 pm | In The Summer List | 6 Comments
Wow, sorry everyone, I took a bit of a vacation, while sustaining a state of denial about it the entire time! While I may have spent a good hour of each day writing music and thinking about making things, I pretty much spent 80% of my time sleeping, making up for all nights I was ever deprived creating the Bike ‘Cycle… and really, also spanning every all-nighter I pulled in college, back to that Welcome Back Kotter marathon I stayed up for when I was nine.
Anyhow, my apologies for stating that I was gung-ho about creating new things, then climbing back to bed. I am ready now though! Today marks one month since my album release, and I believe it’s the perfect time to commence this next degree of creation. And if there’s anything I’ve learned from the experience of making my album, it’s that deadlines work, for me. …almost too well…
So, I’m going to push those limits of diligence this summer. Try to crumble the sole virtue I possess. 10 SUMMER ASSIGNMENTS, all to be completed by the 1st day of Fall —— ABSOLUTELY impossible to do, so we’ll see how much I can get done, huh? I’ve described them below, as well as updated the Projects page to exhibit their statuses.
THE SUMMER LIST (each project to be identified alphabetically):A. Sew 1 dress (using mostly used fabrics) – Given that the last thing I sewed from scratch took about 70 hours, I’m gonna keep it to 1 dress for this summer. But it better be good, and I want a huge majority of it to come from recycled fabrics, meaning cloth from thrift stores, dumpsters, etc. Trimming may be bought at stores however (though I’ll try to avoid this too). B. Hem 6 dresses/skirts – I’ve had a box of clothes to mend since last year, and I’ve postponed it for so long. It’s pretty much a bunch of skirts that need shortening (“PROJECT SLUT”, if you prefer), as well as my old Jo-Ann’s Fabric Store work shirt from high school that I want to turn into a polo dress. C. Finish writing & arranging 18 songs – Definitely the most foolish demand of the summer, but this is my forte (if I get to say I have one), so I better damn well be good at it. These are all my older songs, and scraps of new ones I’ve managed to start. The goal is to have them all ready to record by Fall, and have a summer release for my 2nd album in 2010! …I love casting anxiety months ahead into my own future! D. Decorate my goddamn apartment – Why does this take so much motivation?! This involves selecting bed linens and rugs to purchase, but also sewing curtains and many seat cushions, as well as a construction-paper mural. I better complete this one early… E. Write a letter to Sufjan Stevens – I’ve wanted to do this ever since our college conductor and I transcribed and arranged “Come On Feel the Illinois!” for our orchestra and choir’s Christmas concert. I want to tell him how much of a strong role he’s played in my growth as a songwriter, and hopefully he will accept a recording of our Sufjan concert and my bike album! F. Play atleast 5 concerts – Ok, I admit it: I am very hesitant to book a concert, I do not want to do it. ..Which is why out all 10 deadlines, this one is most imperative. And also why this project is labeled “F” for “I’m fucking terrified”. If I do this right though, by the end of summer, gigging will be come second nature. G. Make 2 music videos and put them up on Youtube – I need to buy a new camera anyhow since the last one was taken by the burglars, so I might as well make it some sort of video camera! And by music video, that could mean anything. We’ll see what I do… H. Be vegetarian – I feel about 10x as unproductive and lethargic when I eat a bunch of meat. And why don’t I just eat meat in moderation? It seems to be all or nothing with me, when it comes to everything. So, I’m going to abstain for the summer, try to cultivate as much productivity as I can to get everything done. Tangents such as recipes and food reviews will hopefully be found on the new food blog that (the illustrious) Jaime Calder and I are starting! I. Record 5 cover songs – Here’s another thing I’ve always wanted to do, but put off to finish my own songs. Well no more waiting! This is just gonna be so fun, I can’t wait. My favorite assignment by far! J. Write one guitar-heavy song – I don’t just mean chord strumming. I mean I want a song full of licks and riffs, melody counterpoint, and just all sorts of harder shit to play and compose for me. |
Ok, that’s it!! Get ready, because haven’t you heard the news from everyone?? ….Summer’s going to be GREAT.
Get the Bicycle Songcycle on Etsy!
May 6, 2009 at 6:14 pm | In Project: Bicycle Songcycle | 1 CommentHi everyone, I have an Etsy page now, where you can purchase the Bicycle Songcycle! I mainly hope that people buy my album so I can empty this ginormous stack of paper bags in my apartment. (The Cash & Carry I bought it from sold them in 500-piece bundles). And if you don’t want an album, might I interest you in a sack lunch?
Also, my previous offer at the release show still stands strong: Barter me something good, and I’ll trade you my CD (Come onnnnnn pony).
Otherwise, I’m finally getting settled into my new apartment. And now that that’s done, it’s high time I started getting back to creative work. Just had a pow wow with Daniel yesterday, so I’m working right now on a Flashmen song called “Kiss My Neck”. It’s pretty hard to write bad-ass music for a change…. For that is maybe the #1 thing that the Bicycle Songcycle was not.
Once I get a better hold on it, I’ll share it with y’all (if it’s ok with Daniel!)
I’m also brainstorming for my next album. Lots of stuff going on in this tiny apartment…! Hope you’re all making lots of things too (and maybe selling them on Etsy too!)
Post Bicycle Songcycle
May 1, 2009 at 11:41 am | In Personal | 2 CommentsSorry everyone for the delay in posts, when I promised that there would be a torrent of them post-Bicycle Day. But I actually moved (AGAIN. For the 4th time in one year) to my own studio, and call me an idiot, but setting up my own place is way harder than writing an album. I am confounded everyday. I will miss the Chateau dearly, and especially beautiful Brian and Chris, but the thefts sort of forced a revision. You know what a new place means, though: New decorations, and new paradigms once more! ..And the fact that I’m currently the poorest I’ve ever been is just another obstruction, I’m telling myself…
Anyhow, I wanted to let you know what I’ve been up to since the album release show, other than packing and moving, and what my outlook is for days ahead. Well recently, I had a great first songwriting collab night with Kendra C., one of the coolest girls I’ll ever meet, playing songs together, as well as getting the freshest, tastiest bread and pastries out of a dumpster. Damn that was cool (and I’m still living off that bread). And two nights before that, I hung out with another amazing girl I look up to very much, Jaime, starting a food blog and going to a cancer-benefit lesbian burlesque show. ….Yes, I look like a trash-eating lesbian. But those two examples not only portray all the cool people I can never believe I get to know, but also exhibit the only way I’ve been spending my free time since the completion of my album: Hanging out with the coolest people.
What’s interesting to me is the fact that in the wake of the CD’s completion, no grand, celebratory, self-gratifying moment has hit me, as well as no bursting dam of all the creative urges I’ve had to restrain from starting. I didn’t notice, but the natural reaction I had was to schedule all my free time away to be with my friends. And it feels really nice, in the gentlest of senses I haven’t gotten to feel in such a long time.
In the same mindset, I thought after I finished my album, I’d be blasting some sort of celebratory music (Justice? My Definitive Stevie Wonder Collection?) and crying on the bathroom floor in joy, much like the last scene of Kill Bill 2. But it doesn’t seem to soak in when I put it on. Instead, what’s been making my heart flutter are the carefree, swooning lines of Stephane Grappelli-style jazz and the White Album — all my favorite songs that glorify the wide-open, meadowy freedom of Spring.
On top of that, I seem to have no thoughts in my mind about the album — be it masturbatory self-praising, or the usual embarrassment and heavy doubt. …Nothing! And I certainly don’t mind that.
I’m giving myself till the end of this week to bask in this pleasant, numbing daze before I hit the creative grindstone again. I don’t feel compelled to be in the action of creating at present, but ideas are starting to gather in my head. Collaborations are big in the future, which I’m very excited about. I’m going to start working on electro-disco tracks with my (soon to be very famous) friend Daniel’s band, Flashmen. I’ve also waited about 2 years to start writing duets for me and my friend, L, who was the super talented violin-player of the Bicycle Songcycle. We’re thinking of the name “L & Elle”, which I looove! He has the cutest voice I can’t wait to write for!
Conversely, I want to inhale inspiration and art, in the form of all music, movies, news, books, and words I’ve been forcing away all last year in order to complete the Bike ‘Cycle. If you guys have anything to recommend, please send it my way!!! I feel exactly as if I poured everything I was ever influenced by, or exposed to, into this album (though in reality that’s no way near true!) and now I just feel very empty — not in any sort of depressing way, though. I mean that I feel like I am 16 again, just starting to develop my sense of aesthetic analysis and character. (Was that a really late age to start doing that? Well fuck you, I was a slow kid.)
I’m eager to meet EVERYTHING.
Retroactive post before the big day
April 21, 2009 at 8:55 pm | In Project: Bicycle Songcycle | 5 Comments#1. Bicycle Songcycle MP3s are up for listening on the music page! If you want a CD, email me up!
#2. I started this post like 5 days ago and couldn’t find a free second to ever post it before the CD release show! So here is a frantic entry posted retroactively:
It’s the race of all races to the finish at the Chateau, cramming in rehearsals, several all-night mixing/mastering sessions (including tonight!), DIY album packaging, bicycle photo shoots, etc. Brian’s been working very, very painfully hard on these mixes. They sound so miraculously good that they take most of my embarrassment out of these creations. It is my job right now to keep Brian awake (for like his third day straight) while he masters. Which would be fine job if I didn’t fall asleep before him every time.
Before I fail to stay awake again, I thought I’d try to finally post about the ad hoc packaging of the Bicycle Songcycle in consequence of funds/time lost due to burglary (see two posts below). Some nice pictures and processes and such. But unfortunately, I just recently realized that the burglar who stole my laptop with my partially-edited album also stole my digital camera (well sure-! why not-!). So.. I’m resorting to using this shitty macbook webcam. Sorry about that. –But I’m actually more sorry for my unwashed appearance. I seemed to think the quality of the webcam would fail to reveal filth. ..That was an incorrect judgment.
So here is how my album will be packaged in paper bags. This idea was handed my way by Katie Pickard and Kendra Wendel, two of the BFFEs, the absolute coolest girls in the world! I bought a shit load of bags at a Cash and Carry, and after folding them in half, I printed out little paper squares of the album cover and pasted them on the front side of the bag.
Here’s where the symbiosis of small paper bag and CD transcend coincidence and reify true love: Not only does CD (in a sleeve) fit perfectly inside the bag, but when you fold the left-over bag over itself, it tucks PERFECTLY into the bottom fold. Heaaavenly.
I then attached brads to one side, and taped strings of yarn to the other side, and voila: parcel-style CD packaging!
For the CD labels, I had a long-term wish to carve a woodblock to stamp onto each label, and for Christmas, my wonderful friend Andrew Young gave me a woodblock kit, the perfect size and everything! So I carved a penny-farthing into it, and also employed a letter-stamp kit he lent me for the titles. Thank you, Andrew!!
I wish I could post a photo of the CD labels themselves, and just clearer pictures of everything else, but the glare on this webcam makes it impossible. I’ll start saving for a new camera asap.
Speaking of cameras, I also had a very quick photo shoot with Karina Natis, the talented photographer of the Mopery [WHICH BTW KARINA TOOK THE PHOTOS IN THE CD BOOKLET AND I SENT THE WRONG EDITION TO PRINT AND HER NAME IS NOT LISTED! IDIOT..!!!]. Aside from the fact that I am awkward and hideous in photos (and irl), they’re such fun photos! All these amazingly talented people I’ve been lucky to meet..
I cannot believe today is the day I’ve been waiting forever for. I have no idea how it will all go! I DO know this: I will say stupid things in front of an audience, and I will get drunk. And I won’t even need the latter to accomplish the former.
The Bicycle Songcycle Project: COMPLETE
April 20, 2009 at 6:38 pm | In Project: Bicycle Songcycle | 3 CommentsI am at a loss for words, emotions, and the ability to access not only the completion of the Bicycle Songcycle, but also the wonderful night of the CD release show, and my newfound freedom. ……It hasn’t hit me yet, it’s just been so long!
The only thing I know, for sure, this: I am the luckiest person in the world to have such great, great friends. So many friends (from Lake Forest College, Chateau friends, friends I hadn’t seen in so long!) came to support me unconditionally and much more enthusiastically than I could ever deserve. And so many other friends that couldn’t make it still sent such loving words of encouragement. I just can’t believe it.
I’m about to leave for a nice celebratory dinner with Julie, but know that in the next couple of days, many blog posts (that I never got to finishing throughout these last few days) will be posted, and new music clips from the album! Thank you so, so much to everyone who came, all who helped in any way with this album (which is like EVERYONE I know) and everyone who ever listened to me talk about this project, and to everyone for just being the kindest friends ever.
A photo shot by the hot and talented Karina Natis, taken in Logan Square
The Bicycle Songcycle!
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